The Wisdom of the East

The face
of nature

reflects
all of

life’s ups
and downs.

Carve your
name on

your heart,
not in

marble.
You are

the center
of attention

wherever
you go.

Three slips of paper inside fortune cookies from a Chinese restaurant in Chinatown, New York City. Submitted by J.R. Solonche.

What Pocket Money Was Invented For

29 x glider planes
4 x toxic slime
9 x glitter cowboy hats
30 x flashing dinosaurs
20 x aeroplane bouncy balls
15 x animal bouncy balls (seals etc)
10 x squeaky smiley face yellow things
9 x gigglesticks
1 x box of rings
5 x large flower hair bobbles
1 x box of flashing frog rings
7 x stretchy lizards
5 x stretchy snakes
7 x stretchy frogs
3 x dinosaur skeletons
6 x toxic toilets
4 x tool kits
box of eyepatch + moustach + loopy lou’s
box of turkey and eggs (24)
box of mouse waterballs (12)
box of roll tongue animals (28)
4 x Dr Who pinballs
Stretchy men
Stretchy aliens
10 wooden floppy type animals
5 wooden animal rulers
10 ‘fly back’ gliders
10 spider man keyrings

A stock list from a novelty stall, picked up while tidying up from school summer fair in Macclesfield, 2012. Submitted by Ailsa Holland.

Thirteen

Try to avoid your movements
in long lonely road after sunset,
which approaches the beach
where there is a poor light.

Item 13 of a photocopied ‘Advice to tourists’ sheet, handed out upon arriving at Kudle Beach, Gokarna, India. Submitted by John K.

£87.88

FINEST HAM, FINEST HAM
FINEST CHICKEN, BONNE MAMAN
DOMESTOS, WHITE GRAPES
TOMATO PUREE, RAZOR BLADES

MUNCH BUNCH, MUNCH BUNCH
CHOC DIGESTIVE, CASHEW NUTS
BRAEBURN APPLE, PEAR HALVES
GALIA MELON, WHLE NUT BAR

TOOTHBRUSH, TOOTHBRUSH
ACTIVIA YOGHURT, HAND WASH
KETTLE CHIPS, SOFT CHEESE
TRACKER BARS, CLEMENTINES

CANDLE BULBS, CANDLE BULBS
SPONTEX PADS, CALPOL
CASE&SON BACON
VALUE K/TOWEL, SHAVING FOAM

FRUBES
DETTOL 500ML
BISCUITS
PAMPERS
CARRS MELTS
W 800G SEEDED
PASTA SHELLS

DEODORANT, DEODORANT
FRST SHREDDIES, FRESH MILK
BAKED BEANS, TUNA STEAKS
CHOC BISCUITS, AFTER EIGHTS

MEATBALLS, MEATBALLS
RICH TEA BISC, CEREAL
R/BERRY CONSVE, FRENCH FRIES
FRUBES POUCH, TOILET WIPES

Tesco receipt, 4th October 2010. The order is changed, but otherwise every single item purchased is included, and appears exactly as it does on the receipt. Mid-line commas added to keep items discrete. Submitted by Gabriel Smy.

Repair


Please take care of the
University’s books and
remember:
books are expensive;
handle them with care.

Protect them at all times
from the elements
and from ink, food
drink and other potential
sources of damage.

Photocopying can damage
books seriously if not
carried out carefully.

Please point out to the
Library staff any necessary
repair work you may notice.


Information on the back of a book reservation slip, Cambridge University Library, 15 May 2009. Even the line arrangements are original. Submitted by Marika Rose.

Genius Bar None


Data transfer, no.
Data transfer detail, none.
Known liquid damage, no.

Cosmetic condition, unknown.
iLife version, unknown.
User-name, na. Password, na.

Issue, fraid cable.

From the Apple Genius Bar ‘Work Authorisation and Service Confirmation’ after they replaced my melted power lead on 7 April 09. Submitted by Gabriel Smy.