Breaking up

What am I supposed
to do now? I’ve got your face
tattooed on my arm.

From a most incredible exchange on Facebook, in which a young man finds out that his girlfriend of one week has had his face inked permanently on her body. Sadly, for us, a hoax. Submitted by Gabriel Smy.

Groceries or pizza?

pizza is just an easy fix
for a temporary solution

A friend’s facebook response to a shopping dilemma on March 1st 2012. Submitted by Rachel Helen Smith.

Five People Liked His Status

I swear,
to everything I got,
I’ll defend my baby
till the end.

If a short,
little motherfucker
wants to
try and threatened
her for saying
something
to a freeloading skank,
who calls her mom
a bitch,
then I got a problem
with him.

Or else what
motherfucker?
Threaten her again
and I’ll show you.

From a Facebook status last year. Submitted by B.J. Jones.

Stream

Lynsey Peterson likes we want
a Scottish flag on Facebook.

Anna Hammond Сака ли некој
да одиме во парк денес?

Rebecca Grohl commented on her own
status: Ich bin eigentlich ueberfluess…

Luke Southey is listening to
Que Veux-Tu by Yell on Spotify.

Clive Law commented on Peter Meadow’s
status: I always put too much red wine…

Natalie Southey and Ruth Garcia-Lopez
are now friends.

Russell Goodwin OMG!

From my Facebook friends latest activity notifications on 17 October 2011, in the exact order in which they appeared.

Decline

Looks fab. Alas I
tame the feral youths
of Wythenshawe on Wednesdays.

A friend on Facebook. By Ailsa Holland.

As in life

The ship is as in life,
as in death;
the ship is eternal,
a symbol of this
and the life to come,
of the gods,
of this middle earth.

A friend’s facebook update, 3 May 2011. By Marika Rose.

The incident of the barbecue in the night-time

Successful barby,
christened new fire pit,
ate much tasty food,

burnt much British charcoal,
did a wheelie on a mate’s bike
(in a small garden),

went over handlebars
into (thankfully cold) barbecue,
landing on face,

drank ale. And I’m not
relishing going to work
in the morning.

A friend’s Facebook status from 3 May 2011.

Effed Up

Find more friends.
More friends are waiting.

These five friends
found their friends using
the Facebook Friend Finder.
Have you found
all of your friends?
Give it a try.

Find friends

Facebook microcopy, 9 October 2010.

Tom Hobson

Tom Hobson suggested
you become
a fan of Tom Hobson.
Tom became
a fan of Tom Hobson
on Facebook
and suggested
you become a fan too.

The subject line and text from a Facebook email.

Called Out

LIFE IS VERY SIMPLE REALLY
!!!!
BUT SOME OF US HUMANS
MAKE A MESS OF IT
…
REMEMBER
AM JUST HERE
TO HAVE FUN
PARTEEEEEEE.

Fugitive Maxi Sopo’s Facebook status, shortly before investigators arrested him in Mexico having traced him through Facebook, 21 June 09.