We’ve got a different CD player now

We’ve got a different CD player now
and so tonight we are here
listening to the two versions
of this song, which is
about divorce.
If it weren’t so hateful, the song
might almost feel like an attempt
to climb out of the undertow
and get a breath of air:
it’s got recognizable situations,
phrases from real life,
the human touch.
But it sticks its head up
above the self-absorbed,
inward-gazing
morass
only to draw attention
to the immeasurable depth
of it all. This is
a mean thing to do.

(An untitled blog post about Radiohead’s ‘Morning Bell’. Submitted by Haley Patail)

Shreddies

(for Fred Goodwin)

For a few years, Shreddies’ advert campaigns
featured a cartoon personification
of ‘Hunger’ as an antagonist.

He appeared as a blue monster with big teeth
whose goal it was to taunt hungry individuals
by drumming on their stomachs
with a pair of silver spoons.

Hunger would then be dispatched
when the victim consumed
a bowl of shreddies,
sealing hunger inside a shreddie cage.

Despite his troublesome persona,
hunger was frequently used as a mascot
for the cereal during this period.

Taken from the Wikipedia entry on Shreddies on 1st February 2012. Submitted by Nick Asbury.

Five People Liked His Status

I swear,
to everything I got,
I’ll defend my baby
till the end.

If a short,
little motherfucker
wants to
try and threatened
her for saying
something
to a freeloading skank,
who calls her mom
a bitch,
then I got a problem
with him.

Or else what
motherfucker?
Threaten her again
and I’ll show you.

From a Facebook status last year. Submitted by B.J. Jones.

Open Grave in a Public Place

Grip the fork in your right hand
with as much strength as possible.

With your left hand use sharp
downward blows in a circular motion.

If you are uncertain,
lift up the palm of your hand
as shown in the diagram

WARNING
Quick questions
Will guarantee
A serious bodily injury

Fitting instructions for a quick release Shimano bicycle wheel. Submitted by Winston Plowes.

On the surface

Greed probably undid her in the end.
She was said to have taken a bait of uncooked tiger nuts,
which swelled inside her until she floated upwards.
Telltale empty paper bags were found on the bank of the river.
Or she may have been pregnant,

with 300,000 eggs causing complications, or stressed
after so much catching and releasing,
those constant brushes with extinction.

On the line between life and death, at Kingfisher Lake,
she breathed the fatal air and did not sink again.
And there she lay,
like Wisdom drawn up from the deep:
as golden, and as quiet.

(From the obituary of Benson, England’s best loved fish. Submitted by Mat Riches)

Post-Painterly Abstraction

for Helen Frankenthaler

She departed from the romantic search
for the sublime to pursue her own path,
pouring turpentine-thinned paint
in watery washes onto raw canvas
so that it soaked into the fabric weave
becoming one with it.

Her method emphasized flat surface
over illusory depth and the nature of paint,
releasing color from the gestural approach
and romantic rhetoric of Abstract Expressionism,
landscapes looking to many like a large paint rag
casually accidental and incomplete.

From the biography of Helen Frankenthaler in the New York Times. Phrases have been picked from the article and put together, in order, instead of one whole excerpt. Submitted by Jenni B. Baker.

Petrifaction


This happens to bone marrow
in the hollow
bird-y
dinosaur bones,
it’s very pretty.
it’ll seem like a solid
black fossil but
if you accidentally
break
it
you see it looks
like it’s filled with crystals



Taken from a comment on a blog post about petrification, written on the 21st December 2011. Submitted by Haley Patail.

You can say I am a hater

You can say I am a hater
but I would argue I’m a lover
I’m a lover of traditional families
and of the right of children
to have a father and a mother

I believe the earth gets warmer
and I also believe the earth gets cooler

is anyone saying same-sex couples
can’t love each other?
I love my children
I love my friends, my brother
heck, I even love my mother-in-law

Quotes by Rick Santorum, candidate for Republican nomination in the US Presidential elections 2012. Specifically, quotes as they appear in Rick Santorum Quotes As New Yorker Cartoons posted by Jack Shepherd. Punctuation has been stripped out and the ‘I’m’ of line one turned back to two words for the irresistible rhythm. Submitted by Gabriel Smy.

Father Rabbit


He;
Is disciplined and discerning
irons his pillowcases and tucks his sheets in
with hospital corners
prefers the cold side of the pillow
suggests if you are going to do it, do it
properly or not at all
prefers you finish what you started
likes his crème brulee unadulterated and his
pancakes thin
is meticulous in his laundry, preferring freshly
washed and smelling of lavender
uses a top sheet

(From the Father Rabbit Ltd about page. Submitted by Marika Rose)