Tag: Gabriel Smy

Looking back

Ten years ago. Stock takers; thieves in Hexham
resorted to extreme measures to avoid
punishment, by stealing a set of stocks
and a pillory from outside the Old Gaol.

Fifty years ago. Head case; A thief stole the
shrunken head of a South American Indian
from a wall of the Fox and Hounds in Whitley
Chapel, where Fred Gazzani was landlord.

Seventy-five years ago. In the dark;
Defying the wishes of the parish
and county councils, a packed meeting
voted against a scheme to install
electric lighting in Allendale.

One hundred and twenty-five years ago.
Carte blanche; Hexham labourer George Wilson
was fined five shillings for not having a name
on a cart he was using on the highway.

From the ‘Looking Back’ column in the Hexham Courant, Friday 29 May 2009.

I want to

I want to die.

I want to break free
lyrics. I want to be anorexic.

I want to break free.
I want to be skinny; I want
to be a model.

I want to be thin.
I want to lose weight; I want
to know what love is

lyrics. I want
to get pregnant.

Google autosuggestions for the search term ‘I want to’, September 2009.

Sixteen Degrees

Most agents report
to a district group manager who reports
to a branch chief who reports
to an assistant chief of their division who reports
to the assistant district director who reports
to the assistant regional commissioner who reports
to the regional commissioner who reports
to the chief of staff to a deputy assistant commissioner in Washington who reports
to the deputy assistant commissioner who reports
to the assistant commissioner who reports
to the chief operating officer who reports
to the deputy commissioner of the IRS who reports
to the commissioner who reports
to the Deputy Secretary of the Treasury who reports
to the Secretary who finally reports
to the President.

The IRS hierarchy, according to a public policy director before the Senate Finance Committee, 11 February 1998.

thetford girls

dimonds are pretty. so are pearls
you aint got nothing on us thetford girls
thetford born thetford bred
phit as fuck and wicked in bed

best things ever is being with shannon
yehh boyy in shitt school but living it up
in DT wiht my best matee shannon

yehh yehh

yeh boy me, mel, lewis living it large
in RMHS science. its shit
we doing a fucking text but hay
we with all r mates so its okaii
my lil shannon mate love her so much
taylor mate ya phitt ass babe 😉

abbey farm woo
fair wen its down
the good thetford crew
and me mates

Shannon Nn Danielle Ere In Dt 09 What A Shit Day x

i love my baby nephew Harley Clark Goldson
and i love my sisterr .. and her tatoo 😀 lol xx
thetford is allright but some times people
just make it really bad such as the parks
but castle park has been allright xx

melissa and sasha love aaron kameana4eva coz he is 1 fit guy!
melissa and sasha love aaron kameana4eva coz he is 1 fit guy!
melissa and sasha love aaron kameana4eva coz he is 1 fit guy!

Thanks to the Portuguese, Thetford town center
now has, for the first time in many years,
women who look good in tight jeans.

The Best Things About Thetford, Norfolk, Knowhere Guide, November 2009.

The Little Red Ship

The Litt Red Ship went to town.
Some shopping The Little Red Ship.
Bid some eggs, shoes, Bred and.
Some cookies and The Little Red Ship.
Bid a Blangcit and The Little Red.
Ship had los fo Fun gud I.
hav Evreey Thing I need but The Little.
Red Ship Forgot To Biy some tishoe.
Soow The Little Red Ship went back To The.
Shop and Brot some tishoe and went.
back To his house.

A story written by my 6-year-old, November 2009.

The System Eats You

Don’t know if it’s appropriate we go
swimming; you go – where I get inspiration.
I noticed your interest, your picture, few
years ago, used to draw attention.

please please

We haven’t talked a while: share your life goals –
table is here, stop the discrimination.
Party arrangements too wild for you?
The system eats you. Fantastic demonstration.

please pay attention
please be with us
please

Subject lines of recent junk email messages.

Poems from the Menu Bar #1

Illustrator/View

Preview overprint,
preview pixel, preview.
Proof setup, proof,
colors zoom in, zoom.

Out fit in window,
actual size. Hide edges,
hide artboard, hide,
page tiling show.

Slices lock, slices,
show template, show,
rulers hide bounding box,
show transparency grid.

Show text threads,
guides smart, guides.
Show grid, snap to grid,
snap to point new:

View edit, views.

Adobe Illustrator ‘View’ menu, October 2009.

At rest

A nonet

At rest. After much suffering, rest.
Sadly missed. In the midst of life
we are in death. Satisfied
when I awake with thy
likeness. Wife of the
above. Not gone
from love. Thy
will be
done.

From gravestones in Histon Road Cemetery, Cambridge, UK.