In the Midst of Life We are in Death

In the midst of life we are in death.

Be ye faithful unto death, a crown awaits for you.
Satisfied when I awake with thy likeness.
Not lost but gone before.
Gone but not forgotten.
Thy will be done.

Not gone from memory
Not gone from love
But gone to his father’s home above.

The Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away.
Thy will be done.

‘Thy will be done’ seems hard to say
When he we loved was called away.

Sadly missed.
She hath done what she could.

None knew thee but to love thee
Nor named thee but to praise.

After much suffering, rest. Peacefully
resting until the dawn breaks.
In the garden of memories we meet everyday.

Why do the robin and the butterfly
linger where you have lingered? Can they know
the knowledge, wit and charity that lie
here now and yet go with you where you go?

At rest. Wife of the above. Thy will be done.

Gravestone inscriptions in Histon Road cemetery, Cambridge, UK.

Alan to Zoe

Alan, Alfie, Ami,
Benedict, Clementine, Eilidh.
Ethan,
Ewan,
Gemma, Georgia,
Huxley, Isaac, Joseph, Leah,
Liam, Macie, Marika.
Mateus, Matthew,
Muadh, Niuniu,
Pietro,
Risha, Seungji, Shilo.
Tamzin, Taslima, Tyan,
Yonatan.
Zoe.

The first names of all my son’s classmates. He’s just started school.

Bagpuss

Once upon a time, not so long ago,
there was a little girl and her name was Emily.
And she had a shop – there it is.It was rather an unusual shop
because it didn’t sell anything.
You see, everything in that shop window
was a thing that somebody had once lost,
and Emily had found,
and brought home to Bagpuss.

Emily’s cat Bagpuss:
the most important –
the most beautiful –
the most magical –
saggy old cloth cat in the whole wide world.

Well now, one day Emily found a thing
and she brought it back to the shop
and put it down in front of Bagpuss
who was in the shop window fast asleep as usual.
But then Emily said some magic words:

Bagpuss, dear Bagpuss,
old fat furry catpuss,
wake up and look at this thing that I bring.
Wake up, be bright,
be golden and light;
Bagpuss, oh hear what I sing.

And Bagpuss was wide awake.
And when Bagpuss wakes up
all his friends wake up too:
the mice on the mouse-organ woke up and
stretched; Madeleine, the rag doll; Gabriel,
the toad; and last of all, Professor Yaffle,
who was a very distinguished old woodpecker.

He climbed down off his bookend and went to see
what it was that Emily had brought.

The voiceover from the beginning of UK children’s TV programme Bagpuss, 1974.

Who Are You Looking For?

Who are you looking for?
Penelope Twee –
Search for a username,
first or last name.
Did you mean Penelope Tree?
We
couldn’t find anyone named
Penelope Twee.

Who are you looking for?
Gilbert Same –
Search for a username,
first or last name.
Did you mean Gilbert Lee?
We
couldn’t find anyone named
Gilbert Same.

Who are you looking for?
John Bob Bobson –
Hmm. Our
name search server seems
to have wandered off.

Who are you looking for?
Wigan Pier –
Sorry, but
you’ve reached your limit
on searches for now.

Microcopy on the Twitter Find People page when I entered the names above, 2009.

The Top Ten Weirdest

The top ten weirdest
and funniest
Japanese condoms.
Ten ways to have fun
with boobs.

Fifteen ads that prove
sex sells … best? Thirteen
haunted houses
that will make you
wet your pants. Girls

get the anime look
with extra-wide
contact lenses. Fresh
baked bread, anyone?
Gruesome body bakery.

Fifteen strange
and bizarre gifts
for the weirdos
in your life. World’s first
eyeball tattoo – ouch!

Ten types of women
you need to avoid.
The top ten
weird and bizarre
Japanese soft drinks.

Top 10 all-time most popular articles on inventorspot.com, as of 13 August 2009.

Hose on Charlie’s Nose

Come on Charlie, get ready to be turned on.

I don’t want a hose
on the end of my nose.
I’ll look like an elephant.

O but Charlie, just think,
you’ll be doing a great job.
Your cold water will be cleaning
Button Moon.

Alright Small, just for you.
Go on. Stick it on.

Small, when you’re ready
for Charlie to be turned on
you just call out
and I’ll get soggy cloth.
He spends most of his time
sitting over there in that soap dish.
It’s about time he did some work.

Sorry Captain Large,
I’ve got the other end of the hose
but I don’t know what to do with it.

Get ready to turn him on.
Slurp. Slurp. Slurp.

Oh well done Small.
Now you can press the button,
nice and slow.

Oooooh.

Dialogue from Button Moon episode ‘Hose on Charlie’s Nose,’ 1980s.

I Find the College

I find the college…
infinitely the best in the university;
for it is the smallest,
and it is filled with lawyers,
who have lived in the world,
and know how to behave.
Whatever may be said to the contrary,
there is certainly very little
debauchery in this university,
especially among the people of fashion.

Unattributed quotation in The University of Cambridge, an ‘unofficial history produced by the University of Cambridge Board of Continuing Education for the use of participants in its courses’.

The Mundane Mr Eggleston

They show us the grain of the present,
like the cross-section of a tree.

Old tyres, Dr Pepper machines,
discarded air-conditioners,
vending machines, empty and dirty
Coca-Cola bottles, torn posters,
power poles and power wires,
street barricades, one-way signs,
detour signs, No Parking signs,
parking meters and palm trees
crowding the same curb.

A dog trotting toward the camera;
a Moose lodge; a woman
standing by a rural road;
a row of country mailboxes;
a convenience store; the lobby
of a Krystal fast-food restaurant –
all of these ordinary scenes.

From the Wikipedia page for William Eggleston.

One For You

This seems to be one for you:

date1 July 2009 06:11
subjectThere he sat and cried

hide details 06:11 (6 hours ago) Reply

Hello. Is there perchance!

switchings

Facebook message from a writer friend – thought she was sending me a poem for this blog until I realised it was spam.